Of all enquiries we receive, suspected infidelity tops the list. Our Newport Polygraph Examiner dealt with one this week that is not an uncommon scenario.

Q: Can you find out if my brother is cheating on his wife?

I’m seriously thinking of booking a lie detector test for my brother but would like a little advice first. Ian is 36 and has been married to his childhood sweetheart for 10 years. They met in high school and have two beautiful boys together but I think he’s cheating on her. Grace has always been a welcome addition to our family and she hasn’t been herself in months. She’s always been bright and bubbly but recently she seems to be withdrawn and uncomfortable in our company.

I’ve tried to ask her what the matter is but she just puts her head down and says she’s tired. My mother has even noticed the change in her. Ian leaves her with the kids constantly and she often calls my parents or me to ask if we’ve seen him.  Reading between the lines, he appears to tell her that he is staying overnight at my parents for whatever reason. He always goes home in the end but then we don’t see either of them for weeks on end.

I’m worried for two reasons – either he’s hitting her or cheating, or both. I’m not sure how we’ll get him to take a polygraph test but with mum and dad’s help I think we can achieve it. They support my decision to ask for advice and if you think it could help we’ll be having a family meeting about it next week. Do you have a Newport Polygraph Examiner?

E W., Newport

Response from our Newport Polygraph Examiner

Both infidelity and domestic abuse are relationship issues that victims find difficult to discuss with close family members and friends.  Their sense of misguided failure tends to keep it behind closed doors, sometimes for years.

We have polygraph examiners throughout Wales and the UK generally.  Whether or not you brother will agree to take a lie detector test is debatable.  If he knows he has a problem and needs help, he might.  However, he is unlikely to want his family to know about it.

You might find it easier to ask your sister-in-law to take one.  Victims invariably find it easier to talk about their problems with a non-judgmental stranger.

If you can get either of them to take a test I am sure it will help. It will get the problem out in the open and pave the way to getting it resolved.

More advice

You can call our free helpline on 0800 368 8277 for a chat with our friendly and confidential customer service staff.  They will be able to give you some advice as to how to persuade your brother or sister-in-law to agree to a test.  Mention that the Newport Polygraph Examiner has suggested that you call.

Alternatively, if you are positive you can get one or other of them to an appointment, you can book a test online via our secure booking system.

Good luck.